escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
What a dumb baby whore.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
