you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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