fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Just invented taco cereal.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
