Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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