I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
