what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
