This girl is more easily done than said...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
