is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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