we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
She announced her abortion via fbk
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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