HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
