I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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