Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
