you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
You dont lie about slip and slides
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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