we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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