people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
