I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You have to summon your inner elephant
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Randomize
