I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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