Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
