end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize