Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
