soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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