well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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