But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Oh god it's open bar.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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