When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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