How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
