What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
