Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
