my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Randomize
