are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
