Screwed.edu
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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