I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
