that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
This house was built for laser tag.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Randomize
