Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
