I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
