I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
