We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
