Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
