I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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