he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
