Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I think I am morally bankrupt
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize