I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize