one might say we're banned from that church
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
