also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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