The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
tell me about the eggs
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
