make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
