she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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