I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
