problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
