Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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