rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
