he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
